I don’t know where to begin with “Terminator Genisys,” the
abysmal fifth installment in the “Terminator” franchise. I don’t even know what
to call it. Is it a sequel? No, because it doesn’t technically come after the
last one (2009’s “Terminator Salvation”). Is it a reboot? Kind of? At the
beginning we’re treated to a lengthy overview of the entire “Terminator” set
up, with voice over from Kyle Reese (Jai Courtney) to provide newbies with
background info. We’re informed that the corporation Skynet brought on the
apocalypse with computerized machines and how John Connor (Jason Clarke) rose
out of the ashes as the savior and leader of the human resistance.
At the same time the movie is peppered with references to
the original films-- “Terminator” and “Terminator 2: Judgment Day—meaning
newbies would get lost right away. Actually, “peppered” isn’t the right word;
every third scene is a reference, a cheeky nod or a wink. In fact at certain points
entire sequences—down to the shot—from those previous movies are recreated. The
iconic sequence of the original Terminator (played by Arnold Schwarzenegger)
being sent back in time to 1984 to kill John’s mother Sarah, (Emilia Clarke)
demanding that a random street punk give him his clothes, for example. “Terminator
Genisys” isn’t a sequel or a remake; it’s an entirely new, unclassified
species. Whatever it is, it’s a convoluted, insignificant mess that basically
screams out at you to stop watching it and turn on the original films.
I won’t even attempt a formal plot synopsis of the film; to
do so would be like attempting real-life time travel. Instead, imagine if the
storylines from the first two features were tossed into a blender and mixed up along
with a few other “new” underwritten storylines and you’ve got the cinematic
slurry known as “Terminator Genisys.” The movie is all about alternate
timelines and alternate timelines of those alternate timelines, caused by
various events in the future. Sequences and plot points from the first two
movies are slightly altered. Before the original Terminator can beat up that
street punk he’s stopped by an older version of the Terminator (still played by
Schwarzenegger). We’ve got Schwarzenegger
on Schwarzenegger action. That’s something, I guess.
Also, if you remember from the first film, Reese—Connor’s
right hand man in the fight against the machines—is sent back to 1984 to protect
Sarah. But what if, instead of being a weak helpless waitress unaware of the
doom yet to come, Sarah was tough and already knew what was going down in the
future? And what if she knew about the timeline in which she’s a helpless
waitress? And what if when the new Sarah was nine years old, a Terminator—the
older Schwarzenegger robot—came to her aid and sort of became a surrogate
father, whom she calls “Pops?”
I could go on but I
think I would die of exhaustion. Simply put, the movie is too complicated for
its own good, there’s too much plot to keep track of. The more you try to piece
the story together the more incoherent and unstable it becomes. And for all
this hassle nothing new really happens in “Terminator Genisys.” It tries to do
everything and ends up doing nothing at all. Fifty percent of the picture is plot points
being dully explained while the other 50% is pure nostalgia, requiring an
understanding of the earlier films. The same plot points and catchphrases are
still there, just shifted around. Instead of Kyle saying “come with me if you
want to live,” Sarah says it. Some of winky references are fun but after a
while the nostalgia factor becomes stale-- the constant need to reference
begins to feel forced. And most surprisingly, the end goal is still the same:
stop Skynet before it can activate its super smart cyborgs. How can a movie
with such an underwhelming end goal be so convoluted in the process?
Perhaps I should give “Terminator Genisys” some credit for
at least attempting such an ambitious storyline in the first place. However,
any ambitiousness is automatically undermined by terrible dialogue, lackluster
acting and action that only gets bigger, louder and dumber. Like the
“storyline” there’s nothing new in the action set pieces—a gunfight here, a
melee fight there, a car chase. Buildings are destroyed, cars are flipped. These
sequences are handled in the dullest and routine of ways while the CGI work
ranges from mediocre to just plain bad. As the movie trucks on, it becomes a
nonstop barrage of meaningless repetitive action. How many times can we see a
Terminator get shot, only for it to regenerate itself? How many times must we
see liquid metal reform into the T-1000? (Oh yes, the antagonist from “Judgment
Day” is here too, don’t you worry). Again, this goes back to the nostalgia
factor. Give the people more of the same.
As the main characters (originally played by Michael Biehn
and Linda Hamilton) Courtney and Clarke are miserable. Both of them overact big
time, a majority of their scenes playing out like a bad sitcom. They have zero
romantic chemistry and zero repartee. I haven’t seen “Game of Thrones” but Clarke
is supposed to be good so I won’t blame her for her disappointing work here. On
the other hand, having been bad in just about everything else he’s done, I’m
convinced Courtney is just a bad actor. His attempts at genuine emotion are
laughable, while his attempts to make quips are painful. The rest of the acting
is unremarkable; the usually solid Jason Clarke is a competent John Connor and
Schwarzenegger is fine—he gets a few funny lines in—but his whole performance
is sort of underwhelming. A tired actor, playing a tired role. When he shouts his trademark line: "I'll be back" you can't help but sigh and role your eyes.
However, I can’t completely fault the actors--the screenplay
by Laeta Kalogridis and Patrick Lussier is the true Achilles heel of the
picture. Maybe the most saddening thing about it is that because of the dense
plotting, the human element is missing. All of the central relationships that
we’re supposed to be invested in get lost in a flurry of alternate timelines,
recycled lines of dialogue and tedious action.
Ultimately, I don’t really know why anyone would waste their
time on “Terminator Genisys.” It’s a confusing, over plotted amalgamation of
the first two movies, with poor acting and repetitive, exhausting action. By rehashing
the same characters and plot points, all the movie does is remind you of the
better “Terminator” movies that came before it.
D
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